A little late, I know, but here are my thoughts on Glee’s nineteenth episode of Season 2, Rumours. Just so you know, the counter I used starts the second the “And here’s what you missed on Glee!” intro starts, right smack at the beginning of the episode. Hopefully it corresponds with the DVD version well. Watch and read at the same time; it’s supposed to be fun!
1:15 So by the way, Tina, what is that rumor about Asian men? Does anyone here know? Anyone? I’ve got no clue.
1:48 Um, Brittany? Atkins is a humans-only diet. So not for cats… and neither is cheese.
1:59 I always wave back at Tina, lol…
2:11 Okay, Rachel, admit it. You kinda deserved that for what you did to him later in this episode. Am I wrong? Seriously.
2:18 Well, yes, Sam’s lips are indeed cute, but mind you, they ain’t gonna be yours to smooch! That right belongs to future Mercedes. Samcedes shipper in da house, yo!!
2:26 It’s the confidence, Rachie. It’s the over-freakin-confidence. Only Finn needs it. Only Finn wants it. Got humility?
2:31 What else could no mean? Seriously, guys, let’s all brainstorm some possible hidden meanings for the word “no.”
2:34 THIS, Ryan Murphy, was a major reason why so many people “assumed” Sam was a junior in Season 2. If he wasn’t really a junior, then why the heck did he look so disappointed about not going to the junior prom? He had obviously wanted to go long before Rachel had asked him to be her date. This – confuses – me!
4:01 Oh, good grief. No one in their right (or left) mind even likes Ann Coulter. This line here scares me.
4:28 April cracks me up every time I see or hear her. She’s adorable.
4:36 And Will asks, “Emma who?” Come on, this isn’t your teen years. Focus on Emma! You know, Pillsbury. Don’t go developing a whole new crush on Missy Broadway!
4:53 Weighing yourself down? Are those brilliant works of performance art not good enough for you?
5:24 …and you obviously have no interest in finding out the real story, am I right, Rachel?
5:30 See how Rachel opens the newspaper to the center pages? And in a few seconds, Finn’s gonna tell Sam and Quinn that the article is “right on the FRONT PAGE of the school newspaper!” Weird how these things change, huh?
5:56 Because he’s a better person than you were. Just sayin’.
6:24 Can someone please tell me why Quinn glares at Sam like any of that is HIS fault?
6:36 Have you ever tried that? I would barf if I had to literally DRINK a dinner. Unless it was one of those meal-replacement milkshakes. Those are good. At least the ones I’ve tried. But yeah, I know what April meant.
6:49 That’s blunt? Sounds pretty gentle to me. Not that I’m complaining.
6:54 What was your play gonna be about, then, if not your life and your emotional journey? I shudder to think… LOL!
7:15 Ooh, mac & cheese? No? Bummer. I miss that stuff.
7:30 Look at her, trying to catch the straw with her tongue. Haha. She probably thinks she’s being sexy by doing that. I just think it’s a huge slice of funny cake.
7:39 Ahh, the look on her face when she mumbles that little confession… Just LOL.
7:45 What’s been stopping you, Mr. Schue? You’re the teacher. Teach what you want, within reason. And this is well within reason.
9:47 Major Wemma-saving little hint-hint right there!
10:27 Almost always, Artie… Almost.
10:38 Oh, re-heally? Since when, Britts? Since you and Santana did that?
10:43 I just laugh. Funny, funny, Brittsy.
11:04 Was that meant to refer to friendship, too? Because it kinda… did. Friends share themselves with each other, don’t they?
11:23 UH-OH!!!!! BIIIIIG MISTAKE! You done made her cry…..
12:52 No jokes on this mark. This guitar symphonette (made-up word, don’t bother looking it up) is a favorite. Beautiful. And the guitar players seem to be moving as one. Very… well, moving.
13:36 I guessed the first time I saw this moment that Sam’s big character development was gonna be about him being homeless and living at that infamous hotel. At the time, I wondered how no one else in the glee club (besides Quinn) seemed to have known about his living situation by now, especially his teachers (including Mr. Schue). Of course, we hear the answer near the end of the episode, don’t we? Ever since, I’ve seen these shots of this motel and the people living there, and wanted to cry. I feel that way to this very day, after seeing this episode at least twenty times.
14:44 Do what, Mr. Gullible? Visit someone else with a friendly and much-needed gift?
15:00 ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME? Sam, the glee club sweetheart, a serial killer? :O Just ugh.
15:38 Poor Brittsy. You look it. … Sad, I mean. You look sad. You don’t look like a panda.
16:00 “Sorry. No offense.” That’s out-of-character! Since when does Santana apologize for ANYTHING?
18:25 What does golf have to do with being a lesbian? Did I miss something? I just don’t see the connection there.
18:47 *swoon* That charming smile! Ahhhhh… *swoons and faints*
19:02 I love how Kurt handles this round of accusations. He’s so ultra-awesome.
19:37 I also love the head-twitch there. That’s just too cute. Ha!
21:15 That’s some gall Brittany has here! Oooh… In her ridiculousness, did she forget she’s a student?
21:45 Perfect. Thank you, Brittany.
22:05 Isn’t that gurgling sound funny? Yeah, I soooo don’t like Jacob. And neither does my story, Yesterday’s Gone.
22:49 Face toilets! I want one of those! LOL, I wonder what it would look like! Haha!!
23:18 “The stormee!” LOL! That’s the second cutest fake word in this episode! Probably in the whole season, too. I wanna be the stormee! Please, can I?
23:58 Ha, Brittany loves it…
24:19 Thumbs up to that thumbs-up, Finny!
25:30 Frankly, so do I. Sorry Finnster.
26:15 And that’s the girl who dyed her hair the color of watermelon bubblegum. But who’d want to chew on that piece?
28:22 Aww, sleepy kitteh… <3
28:27 You’re still not mad at Lord Tubbington? Why? Didn’t he start smoking again? LOL! Switch “still” and “not,” and this wouldn’t be nearly as funny, but at least it would mean what it was meant to mean. But meh… that would be BORING!
28:33 Look bored. Now look at the camera. Good kitty. Hey, Brittsy, are you sure this one smokes?
29:02 What’s Will chewing? He just sat down. Acting FAIL.
30:06 Wait… he’s crying? I don’t see it… Acting FAIL #2!
31:15 Huh? Why is the drum set (and Finn) on the opposite side of the room from the rest of the band all of a sudden?
33:05 This is where I start to get really nervous for Sam.
33:24 As you can clearly see, Chord is obviously the star of this episode. The MVP, naturally.
33:53 And… my heart breaks. </3
33:56 And… my heart breaks a second time.
34:02 And my mood hits rock bottom. Three strikes, you know. :’(
34:19 I usually skip past most of this (to me, pointless) scene to go back to the subject of Sam.
35:34 “Knock-knock!” “Who’s there?” “Open up, I’m your guitar! Didja miss me?” “Holy…”
35:57 My heart just broke again. When will it STOP?? </333
36:02 Didn’t Sam just say it wasn’t? The rest is in the car. Sheesh.
36:06 OTHER CUTIE!!
38:21 Okay, all four of the broken pieces of my heart just shattered themselves. He’s freaking crying! I feel so horrible!! I’m serious, I cry just about every time Sam does here. And I mean sobbing crying, not like, misty-eyed crying. Oh. My. God.
38:26 I just had to stop watching and walk around the apartment a little. I can’t stand this part. It’s so sad…
38:41 Okay, I am so ticked off that so many people think this was the first time he’d EVER cried. Babies cry all the time. Kids cry often, even the boys. I find it hard to believe he didn’t cry at home the day he dumped Quinn for cheating on him. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: he meant it was the first time he’d cried about his family’s financial crisis. Do you really think a sweetheart like Sam had never cried before in his entire life? This wasn’t a plot hole. It was a misunderstanding on the part of the fans. At least, those fans who believed what they thought was obvious, but is actually physically and psychologically impossible. Think about it, Gleeks.
38:47 Oh, she’s too sweet. Three guesses where she got that trait from. Sam, Sam and Sam. CORRECT!
39:29 What the hell is she doing THAT for?!? Are you KIDDING me? WHY?
40:09 “If you brought them”? I see they’re already there. Didn’t you mean “that you brought them”?
40:35 THAT smile (and the voice to go with it) makes me feel dizzy. *faints willingly* I go quietly…
41:38 Yes, Will. Yesterday is gone. But tomorrow, these kids need you to be there with them and for them. We know you’ll make the right choice, Mr. Schue.
41:49 OHHH! THIS PART GIVES ME CHILLS EVERY SINGLE TIME! Be on top of the world Sammykins! You deserve a little something to smile about!
42:18 My heart is officially mended!
42:20 And that’s what you DIDN’T miss on GLEE!